The question of, "If you could change anything about anyone, who would it be and why?" came up in my mind and I decided to share it.
Initially I thought, well, I would change myself. If I could change myself, I could change anyone. The biggest hurdle, as been said, has always been yourself. Why would I change myself anyways? For one, I may not have the biggest issue with my sexuality itself, but it does affect my everyday thinking, planning, and actions. But it shouldn't. Today's world calls for the better welfare of my own individual and its progressive attitude has no opportunity to lapse.
Then I have to deal of my attitude about the world. In many ways, I am in denial of how pessimistic I am. I love believing that there have already been roads paved and seas split for either someone else's opportunities or my own. Conclusively, I shun the doors to optimism at inappropriate times.
I am also in a constant struggle to become a better character. I know that by admitting one's fault or problem, that person has a better chance at overcoming it. I have done this all too many times and I have just about convinced myself that I have attained some sort of mental disease. The ability to just shut myself up about people would be a tremendous goal. Or being useful and ambitious, rather not mediocre or inept, is a possible finish line. Then reality that sh** just happens comes into mind. I could go on about myself, but let's not do that.
My dad on the other hand is someone I would definitely change. While he holds the iron first in the house by managing the family, my belief holds that he takes it too far. Don't jump to conclusions, there is not a single dose of abuse in my household, but there are very opinionated family members. Before I get to my dad, I'll discuss everyone else.
My eldest brother, Mark, isn't much of a threat to the functions of the household as he has matured. His role as the eldest, I believe, as done a great role in shaping his character. My brother James stands as if he is for the contrary.
James is probably the most disrespectful brother or person you will ever meet. Now, that is a harsh statement and I hate to admit it, but it is all the truth you could ask for. His selfish attitude about everything bugs me in the least possible ways. He still doesn't do his laundry. He doesn't pay a dime of rent. And he brings girls over as if it’s some penthouse. His two years in the Marines hasn't changed him one bit, but his superficial tattoos have. Please stop. Please change.
My mom constantly rags about the selfishness of my dad, but at the same time she does her share of income-loss. She is a pristine shopaholic and fashionista who holds her image as high of a priority as she did in high school.
And now my dad. While I do credit his 23 long years of overseas duty, food preparation services, and clerical work in the Navy, his stance on the world has no place on my agenda. That may sound selfish and ignorant, but let me explain. Maybe those two decades have shaped a Republican engine on him, since it's the basis of nearly everything he holds up to. And even though he is technically a veteran, he's already acting like those grumpy senior vets who are completely curtained off from society. His business is his. His money is his. His life is his. No one has any authority to influence it. He is outspoken in the sense that he exercises his every right to speak. In the common place like a restaurant, I am worried when I am with him because of his relentless mouth complaining about a dirty spoon or unbeaten eggs and the possibility of someone else's saliva in my mouth.
He will argue his accuracy or change his stance to win. A month ago, he offered me the gift of a laptop for graduation. We went ahead to go shopping at the Navy Exchange and found this Toshiba. Because it wasn't to my liking, I told him not to buy it until I found a better deal. Today, I found that deal. It was a couple dollars more, but the upgrades, hardware, and overall product during the customization made every dollar worth thrice as much. Now his excuse was that I was being maarte. Being the straight-forward person I am, I disagreed and told him I was just being smart. His argument was that if I hadn't just gone with the plan and bought the Toshiba last week, this argument wouldn't have happened. He began to endorse the motto, "Seize the opportunity once you have it". Sure, this is a nice motto, but the fact that I found a "Better deal and saved money" supersedes this notion.
His intentions are positive, but his motives are for the worse of all things. He's one of those dads who's never lost an argument, or fails to admit fault, nevertheless. His hand is so far out of reach for even I. Perfection is what he aims for. Arrogance is what he achieves.
The pros of my father's attitude lays in Mark, but the cons have settled in James. I seem to be the middle child in this instance as I have a balance of both. I do admit that his attitude has made me stronger, but nonetheless, it has angered me for many years.
If my dad could settle for less — less expectation — life would be a lot easier.
